How I Became Brave

Remember the cricket problem I told you about in the last post?  Well my classroom has crickets.  And I don't mean to semi-tolerable green ones that are tiny little jumpy guys.  I mean the mean mother cock roach crickets that are slimy and have wings and horns and venom and teeth.  Some of that may be exaggerated, but not all of it.

These guys:
Can I just say that googling black cricket to find that picture almost made me sick.  I hate these things!

So what just happened 10 minutes ago that prompted this post?  One jumped on me.  My students are silently working on the computers, I am typing an email, and boom cricket hops on my leg, arm, and squirms away under a nearby baseboard.  What did I do?  Stand up and scream, "CRICKET!!!!!!"  No one came to my rescue but all thought I was crazy.

I immediately googled the words, "How to kill crickets" and now have a plan.  I am going to come Monday prepared. There are still about 30 in the lights, and I have (asked a student to) killed over 15 on the floor between yesterday and today. 

Dave and I are going to have to move if this doesn't stop.  And sources say that the crickets get worse in September.

Want to know the worst part?  My classroom is the only classroom in the school with the problem.  Something about an improperly sealed roof, foundation, doors, windows, etc...who knows.  All I know is Monday, I will have cricket traps, cricket spray, cricket vacuums, cricket killers, and cricket demolishers.  No more jumping around, afraid in my own classroom screaming "CRICKET" for all to hear.
That may have been a little harsh, but I am serious here.

In other news, while I was typing this blog post, the handsy cricket that jumped on me earlier returned and I screamed like a 12 year old girl. You win today cricket.  You win today.


Kirsten said...

I screamed while trying to defeat one of the small green crickets, so I understand your pain.


Kendall Watkins said...

This had me laughing so hard picturing you screaming in front of a bunch of kids "cricket!" Thanks for the good laugh. I hope you make those crickets pay!

daveyshums said...

Oh jessie, you are so very funny.

Funny and hot.

Maybe you should bring the gecko from home. It'd be like their Chuck-A-Rama.

All you can eat, baby.

Mo and Mel said...

Oh how I miss our school conversations. As a response to this HILARIOUS and very real story....I feel your pain. You can imagine what a leaking roof (for over 6 years) has done to the cricket population in my art room. I don't think I have been able to count 30, but I have screached aloud, frightened by the monster cricket who lurks near my doorway only to scurry further under the doorjam after a scare. He has eluded me on many occasion and I am curious to see how your cricket sabotage works!

Amy and Clark said...

Oh Jess, I so feel for you. We have camel crickets out here (try googling those ones) and they ALWAYS make me scream and say four-letter words. Our old apartment had a storage closet that was a breeding room for the little guys which meant they got in the house a lot. So far, we have been fortunately free of crickets in this apartment.